Setting the Gay Record—Straight!American Psychiatry and Homosexuality: An Oral History. By Jack Drescher, MD and Joseph P. Merlino, MD As we grow up gay or lesbian, one of our greatest losses is not having any rich stories and instructive tales passed down to us by those before us. Usually our parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and other elders pass on family jokes, fables, and stories about their own pasts—and our own, when we were younger. They tell us things like where nicknames came from, why they changed their last names after arriving from the old country, how their parents behaved in the old days—family lore like that. But now bookstores are offering an increasing number of titles archiving past events and the recent evolution of homosexuality. As a gay psychotherapist, I have always been interested in the history of how my profession handled—and mishandled homosexuality. American Psychiatry and Homosexuality: An Oral History provides one excellent resource for gaining this knowledge. This book contains numerous interviews of those who pioneered the depathologizing of homosexuality and helped remove it as a mental disorder from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, which mental health professionals use to diagnose the clients we treat. Each time I sat down to read this book, I chose to imagine that I was sitting at the feet of those being interviewed, and that they were telling me stories the way my grandmother and other family elders did with me as I grew up—stories that intrigued me, angered me, made me cry and made me laugh out loud. Without this kind of oral history, our pasts would be lost, individually and collectively. This book sets the gay record straight. The front cover illustration is haunting, bearing a photo of a man wearing a mask that resembles something from the horror movie, The Hills Have Eyes. Under the mask is Dr. John Fryer, M.D., a psychiatrist who in 1972 spoke at a psychiatry panel on homosexuality, appearing as “Dr. H. Anonymous,” disguising his true physical identity—and even his voice. In those days, to come out as a gay psychiatrist meant a ruined career. Fryer came to this meeting to depathologize homosexuality, telling about those gays and lesbians who were not troubled and did not seek out therapy. John Fryer took the first public step for us all, clinicians and laymen alike. I knew that homosexuality was removed from the DSM in 1973, but was not aware that gay political pressure played no role in the APA’s decision to have it removed—as anti-gay therapists Drs. Irving Bieber and Charles Socarides later claimed. In reality, the decision was “influenced by the weight of scientific studies” and a vote by the APA’s Board of Trustees, with two abstentions. I first learned about Bieber when I was in college, writing a paper on why homosexuality was a disorder and should be considered so. I was then in my own early stages of coming out and, not wanting to be gay, sought out literature to support my denial and write that paper. I still have that paper, to keep and archive my own personal journey. Just as s the pioneers transcribed in this book have something to teach those of us coming up—and out—behind them, so do we, the younger generation, have something to teach them as well. In an interview, Charles Silverstein, Ph.D., psychologist and well-known author of The Joy of Gay Sex, speaks out against other gay therapists who, he says, “condemn other gay people’s sexual behavior” by diagnosing sexual compulsivity. He says that gay therapists using that diagnosis are doing the same to other gays as heterosexual therapists did, which is to “diagnose these people as suffering from some illness because you’ve identified with society’s rules.”
On this area of expertise, Silverstein could not be further from the truth. As one who specializes in treating sexual addiction and compulsivity, I use this diagnosis very carefully with men and women, both gay and straight, who suffer from compulsive sexual acting out, without experiencing pleasure. This is not based on my “moral views” as Silverstein claims, but my recognizing compulsive, dangerous and life-threatening sexual behaviors resulting from trauma in early childhood, not on being gay. But I appreciate Silverstein’s concern and hard work to restore homosexuality to its rightful place of normalcy. There are also details in this book that will make you laugh, at how insane things were in the 1970s and before. For example, one interview subject—Robert Jean Campbell III, M.D., well-known for Campbell’s Psychiatric Dictionary— recalls how anti-gay analysts Bieber and Socarides were at it again, trying to keep homosexuality diagnosed as a disorder in the DSM. Asserting that some homosexuals underwent an “identity crisis,” they invented a diagnosis called “sexual orientation disturbance” until someone pointed out that the acronym for “sexual orientation disorder of male youths” is sodomy. For me, one very enlightening interview was the one with author and psychiatrist Dr. Richard Isay, M.D. who helped openly gay men and women to be accepted in Analytic Institutes to learn psychoanalysis. Before that, you were rejected if you were openly gay. Early in my career, Isay’s books, Becoming Gay and Being Homosexual inspired me in developing my work with gay men, providing psychotherapy to and facilitating retreats, workshops and groups for gays. I enjoyed reading how his beliefs about orthodox psychoanalysis changed, and how he let himself grow and re-think the assumptions he had learned and used for years—creating change not only on the outside, but on the inside as well. Isay lived what he preached. All of the pioneers in this book paved the way for me so that today I could be an openly gay clinician, publishing books on being gay by both gay and non-gay publishing houses. I feel honored and proud to stand on their shoulders, knowing the pain they went through to help us get to where we are today—liberated! Joe Kort, LMSW
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LEARN HOW TO DISARM--NOT STRONG ARM--YOUR PARTNER IN COMMUNICATION Getting The Love You Want Couples Workshop in Royal Oak, MI Gay and Lesbian Workshop October 19-21, 2007 Royal Oak, Michigan in Joe Kort's Office
I am presenting these workshops for couples based on the best-selling book, "Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples" by Dr. Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. which can be purchased in Joe's library
This workshop is worth 6 months worth of work and time in couple's therapy. While not a therapy weekend, it is very psycho-educational and therapeutic. You will learn several effective communication exercises which start you in the right direction to work through hard conversations and resolve conflicts with your partner
This is not group therapy of any kind. Couples often worry that they will be asked to disclose personal information within their relationship. This is not true. The majority of the workshop is private for the couples in terms of what they are discussing. Often couples will come through the workshop and never say anything publicly about the inner workings of their relationship. There is no pressure or requirement for group sharing. The confidentiality and privacy of your relationship is assured unless you decide to disclose yourself at the workshop. This keeps the workshop safe and effective. _____________________________________________________________________ Relationship Class for Straight Singles and Gay/Lesbian Singles Every Tuesday 8-10 pm, October 2-November 13, 2007 in Royal Oak, MI SIX WEEK WORKSHOP FOR GAY, LESBIAN, AND STRAIGHT SINGLES This 6 week workshop is appropriate for singles not currently in a relationship, who are tired of making the same mistakes over and over again and want to learn the secret to finding and keeping lasting love. This workshop is all about transforming the self. Often we are tempted to think the problem is "finding the right person." But this workshop is all about "becoming the right person." This workshop is also an ideal follow-up workshop for those who have taken the couples workshop. Couples have gone through this workshop together after the couples workshop. It is a great opportunity to reflect on one's self within the relationship. _____________________________________________________________________
For more information about cost and times and/or to register for the Relations Classes and Workshops go to REGISTRATION
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Gay Affirmative Therapy for the Straight Clinician:
The Essential Guide In press from WW Norton Books due out in 2007* A book for helping straight clinicians work with Gays and Lesbians
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ As a psychotherapist, if you have gay and lesbian clients, It’s not enough to be gay-friendly. The fact is, even the best intentioned therapists have some level of homophobia to overcome. From birth, heterosexist culture imprints us to think that heterosexuality is primary,and that any other orientation is inferior. It’s not even enough to be gay yourself. Gay or straight, we’re taught the homo-negative belief that the "alternate lifestyle" of being gay is a more difficult way to live. But the "alternative" of living heterosexually is actually harder for gay men and lesbians, and can lead only to depression and self-defeating, or even self-destructive behaviors. Learn the issues that gay men and lesbians face. They may surprise you! To pre-order click here >>> "Gay Affirmative Therapy for the Straight Clinician: The Essential Guide" by Joe Kort, MSW, LMSW This book will offer skills and information to straight therapist working with gay, bisexual and lesbian clients. It is not enough to be gay friendly. It is crucial that therapists be armed with the facts and information to do effective work with their gay, lesbian and bisexual clients. It is based on my work with Gay and Lesbian clients, my own personal journey as a gay male and psychotherapist of 21 years, along with the information I teach at Wayne State University's School of Social Work on Lesbian and Gay Studies
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"10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do To Find Real Love": Introduction:
Start Your Hero's Journey and Let Your Initiation Begin! Chapter 1:
Live in Integrity and Be Accountable to Yourself and Your Partner Chapter 2:
Become the Man You Were Meant to Be Chapter 3:
Discover How What You Hate Can Help You Love Chapter 4:
Go from a Gay Boy to a Gay Man with Your Father Chapter 5:
Recognize the Difference Between Mommy Nearest, Mommy Dearest, and Mommy Queerest Chapter 6:
Learn How To Disarm--Not Strong-arm--Your Partner In Communication
Chapter 7:
Know Your Sexual Shadow Chapter 8:
Understand the New Mixed Marriage: When Three's a Crowd Chapter 9:
How to Call It Quits Without Being a Quitter Chapter 10:
Bring Your Own Shadow
By showing how to look closely at the deepest sources of your wants and needs, "10 SMART THINGS GAY MEN CAN DO TO FIND REAL LOVE" will help you achieve the kind of lasting close relationships you deserve.
Read an introduction to the book. Visit Amazon.com to purchase the book.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 10 smart things gay men can do to improve their lives are: Introduction
What Works? And What Doesn't? Chapter 1
Take Charge of Their Own Lives Chapter 2
Affirm Themselves by Coming Out Chapter 3
Resolve Differences With Parents and Relatives Chapter 4
"Graduate" From Delayed Adolescence Chapter 5
Avoid-or Overcome-Sexual Addiction Chapter 6
Learn from Successful Mentors Who've Been There, Done That Chapter 7
Take Advantage of "Therapy Workouts" Chapter 8
Achieve-and Maintain-Rewarding Relationships Chapter 9
Understand the Stages of Loves Chapter 10
Commit to Their Partner Read an introduction to the book.
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Foreign translations of Joe's First Book
"10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do To Improve Their Lives" was originally published in 2003. In 2004 it was translated in both German and in Spanish.
Each of these books can be ordered at German Translation: and Spanish Translation: _____________________________________________________________________ Click on the images of the books to purchase Joe's two published books at Joe's library .
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Autographed Books You can purchase an autographed copy of Joe's books by using a credit card or sending a check, money order to Joe Kort, LMSW, 25600 Woodward Ave., Suite 218, Royal Oak, MI 48067 $25 per book (includes shipping and handling)
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ If you want to book a signing or workshop anywhere in your area please feel free to contact me at joekort@joekort.com or 248-399-7317.
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